I am covering two episodes in this post, one after my sons birth and one before.
The One after
My mother had valve disease for long and was under medication.It was progressively deteriorating and the physician recommended that medicines alone wont work any more. So we were asked to see a surgeon. We went to the hospital. Before the surgeon could see my mom, we were recommended by the cardiologist to admit her to stabilize her symptoms. She was fine for two days. On the third day, she was supposed to be moved to her room for the surgeon to assess future course. At 6PM she was talking to me and played with my son. Suddenly there was pandemonium as one of the patients in the critical care unit passed away. Unfortunately few of the relatives entered the unit crying and screaming loudly. The nurses and the orderlies were taken aback and it was quickly put in order. (I am not blaming that caused it) But it definitely triggered a panic attack with my mom. She got uncomfortable and her monitor went crazy. I called the nurses and she was shifted to the critical care section. Around 9 PM she was pronounced dead due to heart failure and other causes. The death certificate probably had a 100 reasons for death! I spoke with the attending doctor as to what went wrong as she was fine at 6 PM chatting with me. He said something about the heart functioning at only 20% and such patients are like cat on the wall. But the event etched in memory is the panic that was triggered.
One before
I was in school 8th grade. This is another event that is still vivid. My grand father asked for my grand mother. She came in and asked him what he wanted. He said he is having chest pain. She immediately asked for Iodex, Amruthanjan and other such lotions/oinments. He said it does not matter as it looked serious. She started getting worried and was asking him for further details on what he was going through. This one is a classic. He looked at her and said " it is gone". Immediately there were some bubbles/froth in his mouth. By the time I had brought in the local doctor, he confirmed death by massive heart attack,
This time, what is etched in my memory is the quiet confidence even when he was under a massive heart attack. Of course the mute point is if he had given the indication an hour earlier the result would have been different. But still the way he faced death was very impressive and I was just 13 or 14.
Perhaps asking you to be present during the delivery (now insisted for every male) is mainly impress on how painful it is to mother delivering a child and therefore unnecessariy go in for another child.(part of family planning program.
ReplyDeleteI had sleepless nights since my boy hood to adult age thinking of what is going to befall after death. Then chanting some slokas i used to sleep away. It continued even when i was awake sometimes. Later after reading commentary on Thiruvoimozhi etc., I got over this expecting something good only after death. But enjoy life in the company of spiritual texts wondering the way The Almighty plays with his children.
regarding your grandpa's last day Rama used to tell that she was sure that father's day is over. She recounts often that she even asked you to pour tulsi theertham and chant narayana in his ears. Grandpa was so devoted to Rajeswari and he murmurred i am unable to utter your name.
So also when your grandma was bleeding from her mouth, Rama decided it was her end.asked me to pour theertam (being Ekadasi and Friday)in her mouth. As soon as i did she was off as if she was waiting for it only.
For your mother I have been attending on her when she had the valve replacement at G H, taken once to Raju Nursing home when excessive bleeding was there. That last day I uttered certain slokas to give her comfort (which i normally do to persons in hospital including my mother). By the time we reached home news came. Then I rushed back to assist in bringing her body home.
Some time my prayer works and the patient recover as in the case of Jagu in Sep 2002 when his blood count was just 400 and for Babu in DEC 03 - Jan 04 when he had severe jaundice.
Ofcourse when I did it for him two days before he passed away when i came from Kumbakonam and stayed with you at K K Nagar.
Somehow this time with Anna it never occured to me that i should do this prayer. May be I was confident that he was doing fine with his random breathlessness.
I generally don't go to see persons admitted in the hospital unless i myself had admitted them there.
In my father's case i fetched the doctor in time. but he forgot to bring the injection with him. Then I rushed back to bring it from his clinit which was some 50 houses away. But when i returned he was coming down the stairs and said not required. Only the previous night my eldest brother left for Chidambaram. Even as he was getting down from the Train telegram reached his host who sent him back to the bus stand in the same horse coach which was at the station to bring him to their place.
In my mother's case i flew from Delhi with Rama and was with her (in coma) in a private nursing home and then in G H. I just went to the nursing section across to ring up my eldest brother having food at Anna nagar.At that time my mother opened her eyes and said something and relapsed. the person in the adjacent bed told me.
Death in a way is not bad and welcome as it puts an end to certain uncertainities in the life of the dead.
Let us live with hope that the One in Whom we repose our Faith for good or bad would due take note of things to be done in His way.